I'm of the following opinion.
Sometimes people--friend, acquaintance, or a chance-meet--make mistakes and are very painfully aware of the enormity of the decisions' stupidity or recklessness. And they are sorry for the deed, not just the consequence.
When these people come to me--for advice, to vent, or so on, and whether or not they have done offense to me personally--I hope God gives me the perception to sense that they are indeed sorry. I pray even more for the grace and kindness of my Brother Christ Jesus to see that they have beaten themselves up enough about what they have done and that I will have the ability to take their "club" away from them--they don't need my help heaping up guilt on themselves.
Not everyone who has strayed from the right path needs a thrashing, and if they do, it's very likely not supposed to come from me.
Hugs, tea or coffee, chocolate, silent empathy, or all of the above are maybe better salves for the grieved hearts.
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